Why I Run: Bridget Boyle
Ten years ago, my mother called me to say she had just been diagnosed with leukemia. She was being admitted the very next day to undergo an aggressive chemo regimen. I had to put this near-hysteria-losing-my-mind panic somewhere. So, I started to walk-jog-walk to keep my world from crumbling.
Then I was running. When I run, I become centered again.
I ran through being laid off. I ran through my divorce, through packing up my home of 20 years and moving the kids to a new town, new school, new job.
I ran through dual diagnoses of my kids’ severe depression, the ever-present fear of teen suicide, the constant, self-blaming voice in my head that “I have failed as a mom.”
You have to be strong for your kids. Game face was on until I could lace up my running shoes and fall apart on the asphalt knowing that by the end of my run I would be re-glued again. Running asks only one thing: for me to be me. Slow me, strong me, whimpering me, fast me – whichever Me shows up, it is still okay. My runs make me a better mom, daughter, and friend-to-self.
I run to restore my place of peace.
Bridget is a mother of two, ages 20 and 16.
Tags: running through grief